the sea anemone in me

I didn't know my heart could race that way.
As scared as I'm not, I'm about a thousand times more terrified than I've probably ever been.
But it's not horror-movie-terror, it's not world-disaster-terror.
It's the most amazing kind of terror, that makes your knees weak,
it's exciting and mystifying and terrible and the best thing that's happened in a long time.

I can't sort it and label it like with other feelings, it's too soon.
There's still so much to shed, so many things standing in the way.
What were roadblocks are more like a cement fortress and standing beside I am so tiny.
When I've ever felt large, I can't say when or why but I know it's existed in me before, this makes me shiver from the inside out.
Somehow it doesn't seem impossible, even still. I think that comes from you.

If you can keep this up, I can wind my springs and just maybe we'll get out of this.